two grown men AND myself cry today.
for some reason when i talk to these particular two, i always end up asking hypothetical questions like, "what would you do if you weren't an architect?" or "if you were to live anywhere in the world, where would it be?" so today while having lunch/dinner, i started asking what they would do if they were told they were to live for only 1 hour; 1 day; 1 week; 1 month. then for the kicker, i asked them what they would do if they only had 5 minutes to live but they couldn't tell anyone they were going to die. at first, you can see their brain working as they ponder the question. i was doing the same. then all of a sudden, we started laughing at how sad the question was. then the tears came next. crying and laughing at the same time, we must've looked ridiculous at the restaurant. it was never my intention to get anyone to cry. it just happened as we thought more about the "5 minute" question.
it is a sad question, the type no one wants to think about because of its morbidity. however, i do find myself thinking about death once in a while. sometimes i find myself thinking that i'm ok with dying at this moment. a few times i say to myself that i have way too many things to learn and do that i fear dying mostly because i won't be remembered as i wanted to be remembered.
then there's the whole discussion of the afterlife. i believe we have one, but what do we do? do we keep doing the same thing, essentially be the same person? do we meet new people? do we foster relationships with other afterlifers? do we feel pain and sadness and heartbreak in order to feel happiness and love (just like in "normal" life)? i might never know the answers and no one might be able to tell me the right one until i get there.
for now, i go on with this life.